Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Why Copenhagen doesn’t matter

The Copenhagen climate summit was a disaster, we are told. But for whom? I suspect that the corporations of the world will, treaty or no treaty, keep on making the world cleaner as long as they think there’s money in it. And we the public will continue to recycle, because we prefer to live in clean surroundings.

Therefore, the summit was a disaster only to politicians, who think things only happen when they get involved. Besides, the meeting was mostly about who should give money to whom, anyway, so no reason to get our knickers in a knot.

Monday, December 28, 2009

“Important” bankers need money

I’m getting mixed messages from the banking world. On the one hand, they are saying that they provide a vital service to the world economy. On the other, bankers are threatening to leave the UK after the country placed a supertax on their salaries.

Now if you truly feel that you are providing a vital service to society and “doing important work”, isn’t that a reward in itself?

I don’t hear anybody threatening to leave Britain if their work is made less rewarding. No, the only reason bankers ever leave anywhere is if someone threatens to take away their big bags of cash.

End of story.

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

The rain on my skin

I rode the bus today. Read Neo about how Swedish authorities forcibly evict people from their homes to accomodate business owners who want their land. But that story will have to wait, because this one is about the bus driver’s mismanagement of the radio.

I was disturbed in my reading by him raising the volume so everybody in the bus could hear it. Apparently he wanted us to delight in the soccer results from today’s Real Madrid and Milan games. And maybe some others. I tried not to listen. I once worked with a reporter who took no interest in sports since he didn’t consider sporting events to be real events. They were staged, he said, taking place at pre-determined times and places in front of people who all agree to gather to witness an event. He was almost crucified by his colleagues, and I remember thinking it was shocking but intriguing. Now, 20 years later, I have come around to his thinking.

Anyway, after the soccer results Natasha Bedingfield’s amazing song Unwritten came on, with its message of taking control of your life and being everything you can be. Today. And the stupid driver turned the volume down. He probably just lost interest when the soccer results were in, but in my mind it turned into a tug-of-war for people’s attention; with thoughtful introspection holding the shit end of the stick after being beat out by a make-believe event featuring grown men kicking a ball.

If you don’t know the words, here are some of them:

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Even more beautiful than soccer.

Friday, December 04, 2009

Roo farts


There are sundry ways being a vegetarian helps me feel superior, but one of my favorite ones is the fact that cow farts contain the greenhouse gas methane and thus contribute to global warming.

Now, however, I have learned that kangaroo farts don’t contain methane. So if you must eat the body parts of other species, stick to kangaroos, okay?

For the environment if not for the roos.

Thursday, December 03, 2009

Small talk

Where is your favourite place in the world?
St. John’s, Newfoundland, Canada. It feels like it’s at the center of things, even though it’s off-center and out of work. It’s has a very deliberate harbour entrance, and seeing polar exploration ships docked waiting for ... whatever, adds a spice of adventure.

What book changed your life?
Catch-22 by Joseph Heller. It made me realize that literature could be hilarious as well as instructive and beautiful.

What does it mean to be a writer?
To try on new costumes and seeing that nothing bad happens. Except you learn stuff.

What books are currently on your bedside table?
John Irving’s Last Night in Twisted River and En Perfekt Storm, a book about the global meltdown by a Swedish free thinker named Johan Norberg. Plus a couple of yearbooks from the Swedish Touring Association. They’re great, but I never get around to finally finishing them.

Who are your literary influences?
Joseph Heller, John Irving, Tor Nørretranders, Justin Quirk, Lucy Kellaway.

How do you relax?
Running, meditating or watching American sitcoms like Scrubs or Two and a Half Men.

Where do you write best?
At my desk, not overlooking anything. In my dreams, though, I have a little gazebo like the one Sting has, with a tiny stove and wooden benches.

What are you most proud of writing?
My Masters paper on freedom of expression in Southeast Asia. We were encouraged to explore alternative literary modes of presentation, and I took the challenge and ran.

What is your daily writing routine?
I fiddle around between leaving and collecting at daycare, then do my real writing between 9 pm and 1 am.

Who is your perfect reader?
A woman who is desperate to escape reality and doesn’t have her hopes up. She is female because I find them more forgiving.

What would you change about yourself?
My obsession with having everything neat and tidy before I get started. Needless to say, sometimes I get nothing written.

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Gott in Himmel!

I’m no shopper, but I do believe in treating people like grownups. That’s why I object to German churches cajoling the Berlin government into forcing shops to close on advent Sundays next year. Both Protestant and Catholic leaders couldn’t stomach the thought of people shopping when they feel like it. No word yet on what Muslims or atheists think.

“This is a clear signal against the total subordination of society to the economy,” says the Central Committee of German Catholics.

Hey, I’m against subordinating society to the economy as much as the next guy, but my dear Germans – there is such a thing as free will. If you don’t want to shop on a Sunday, then don’t. And if you’re a shopkeeper who considers it a hassle to stay open when your customers want to shop, you deserve to go out of business.

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Bahrain – the cheapskate of the Gulf

Alert readers may remember that I barfed on the British island of Guernsey a while back for not wanting to contribute to society by paying taxes. Now the tiny Persian Gulf kingdom of Bahrain brings more of the same sleazy egotism.
In a promotion campaign for ”Business-friendly Bahrain”, the country tries to attract investors with the argument ”no corporate tax, no capital gains tax, no withholding tax and no income tax”. And, ”Despite having the region’s most skilled workforce, our labour costs are the region’s lowest”.
So what Bahrain is saying to the already filthy rich is this: ”Invest here! We promise not to make you contribute to boring stuff like the paving of roads, hospital emergency rooms or kindergarten teachers. You won’t even have to pay your workers decent wages. Isn’t it great?”